Relationship Videos

I Have here listed some interesting relationship videos that once helped me in a break up I sincerely did not want.. however, I have to say that I DO NOT always agree with everything said in some of these videos.. as a matter of fact, not only do I not agree, I sometimes take completely opposite view points.  In those cases, I'd like to share those view points with you and let you be the one to decide on your relationship strategies and values, not me, nor another outsider no matter how experienced they may be..  Experience is the best teacher, and this is your personal life-experience.  Smile..

Talking about these break-up videos I've listed below, I'm going to go out on a limb here, and tell you what I agree with and what I disagree with.. ultimately, as you know, it's your decision.. your call and we respect that at all times here on Fantasy Moves Dating- Fantascape

First of all, I am one who believes that real love can happen very fast.  Maybe not at first sight; but very fast after first sight. 

I personally feel, that when a break up happens, it should be looked at as an honest break up, with no expectations of our lover coming back.  I 

I personally feel that while breaking up is the most difficult thing we can go through when someone we love decides it's time to go on his seperate way, he/she has given thought to this break up even if we don't know about those thoughts.  He/she is making a life-change decision for themselves, and while we don't want the break up, we have to view ithe break up as final.  Otherwise, it's simply boils down to manipulation- expecting that there is somehow something we can do or not do that will make them or cause them to change their minds.. and manipulation is not in my romance language/vocabulary.  

Manipulation, even if it's just me thinking about it, hurts me.. it doesn't hurt the one who did the breaking up, it's me that endures endless weeks of torture believing or hoping they might come back.. no!  Break up is break up.. and if and when they contact us again, we will be different and so will they.. we would have to look at the relationship from the new and different vantage points.. just as if it were bran new all over again.. 

And, furthermore, when we do, if we do, look at the relationship once again.. we will understand how much we have really grown since the break up.  A decision may be that we actually don't want to go back and yet, we may want to start again on new and different ground.. that decision can be made if and when our love or now past love ever contacts us again.. so, I agree.. when the break up happens, do not continue to contact that other person who did the breaking up.. let him/her live his/her decision in finality and peace.. 

Do not harrass, ask questions why, try to find out what is going on with them, stalk them etc.. these are all mindless games in our own heads and those games need to be checked at the door of any break up.. all relationships can or at least have that chance of a break up.. no relationship is invincible and super human.. we need to decide as adults right from the beginning; that if this ever occurs to us, it's fast, decisive, and final right from the moment of the break up. 

Respect For Privacy

Respect for another human being's privacy is love.  It is love in action.  Love will be no man's jailer and issues of a break up is on the shoulders of the one doing the break up.. it's their decision.  Remember?  Can that loved one come back?  Certaintly!  But, in a new light, a new deal, a new way..  with new understanding..  It's their call to contact you or I in the case of a break up, not our call.. we let them go and sour like an eagle just like we ourselves want to do.. 

As I said, this is my opinion.. I hate manipulation of any kind.. I wouldn't even want a man if I had to manipulate him.. I want to spend my time loving him not playing silly and destructive games with him.. .. IMO

https://www.bringexbackblog.com/

Have I personally been on the receiving end of a break up?  Certaintly.. I think we all have.  I've been the one to break up and I've been the one to be broken up with.. it's all in my life-experience.  

What do I do, or how did I handle it?  Truthfully, I follow my own advice because when I was 19 years old I broke up with a guy I didn't actually like all that much.  To be really quick with the story, that guy called me every few minutes.. went to places I'd go, sent me letters, etc. What that did was chase me away further, make me more angry than not, and I developed a huge distaste for anyone else that even resembled him.. not fair, but true.  

I would never want anyone to go through that if they broke up with me.. I'd want to give them assurance that it's ok.. maybe it hurts, but it's what they may feel is right for this time and place and while I never want to appease anyone, I don't want to hurt them either. 

Revenge isn't in my vocabulary for romance at all.. I want to leave sleeping dogs lay where they will.. 

If You Are In A Relationship That The Other Person Is NOT In 110%, You ARE FOOLING Yourself, it's not a romance. 

Romantic Love Relationship Is EXACTLY like a dance

Making Love Is EXACTLY LIKE THIS DANCE (BELOW)

The strength, the conviction, the complete concentration; complete attention to each move- each forth coming move and each transition.. real love making includes all of those things.  Just having sex; not even in the same breath can the two be compared.  Sex without the chemistry that moves our beings in such a way that we know we are different.. is what I call "Tin Can Love".. 

Afterplay.. How Important Is It?

Understanding Feelings- I've never heard of anyone talking about it specifically, but I believe there should be such a thing as "After Play ".. 

We've all talked and talked about forplay in love making.. but we don't talk about the after affects of love making and it's feelings for us. . .   I'd like to talk about that.. I'd like to include the thoughts of after play in my love life..   I think after play is almost as important as forplay is.. 

After play is a simple expression between the two lovers of how much our love making meant to us, how we feel afterward and how it causes us to move closer to each other.. it's an open communication of the after affects.. 

To me, love making is a three-stage process, not a two-stage process.  After care is important.  Telling my man how I felt in his arms both before love making and during love making is important to me.  Telling my lover how much his words to me during love making meant to me is important.  Telling him all about how I feel in his embrace is important to me..  I'd like to be able to tell him all of those things he is to me when we are the most intimate.. let him know his impact on my, the thought of another kiss like the one we had.. when we made love. 

I don't know for sure, but maybe without the after play, there can be a let down; a break in love making communication between a man and a woman.  Maybe it's just back to life as usual without after play..   Maybe some couples come together for love making, then go back to life as usual only to just 'connect' again physically.. 

Maybe the untouchable love making can come after the love making when the partners communicate with each other through out the normal days and nights about their feelings when they make love.. just maybe. 

Sometimes it is the untouchable elements of our souls that need the communication after play; we do need the forplay, we know that.. we need the passion in our love making; we understand that.. but what about afterward,  in the after experience of what just happened between us.. sould we neglect that part of our love making?  I seriously doubt it.. 

When Break Up Comes- 

Replacement Techniques.. Totally wrong!  No human being can be replaced, not anyone.  Certaintly not someone we love or once loved close up and personal.  Trying to move on into another love/romantic relationship which seems to be us trying to replace our lover is a stumbling block to us ultimately.  And, it's ultimately a stumbling block to anyone we are using to replace our once lover. 

Let's not go there.  Let's realize we loved him/her and find the benefits of that love and treasure those benefits, not blame them for breaking  up with us.   This way we can heal much faster and our healing will be complete.. our healing will serve our best interest and everyon else's best interest for whom we may yet meet in our future.  So, we've stopped blaming them, and we remember it's ok to be single again.. (very ok) and we move forward into our destiny and future with confidence in love, not disappointment.  

Now on to NEW LOVE-  NEW BEGINNING.. and, it's a truely great feeling.. to be renewed in spirit and refreshed in our soul and ready for our love affair that's waiting in the wings of a healthy man and/or woman.. 

Elvis sings it.. just right  I aint greedy baby, all I want is all of you!  What a good feeling, smiling all the while saying it.. 

It's A Brand New Day.. when healing comes and we can move on and move up... Breakup isn't always the wrong thing for us.. 

I Think Love Does Shake Us Up

Honestly, I believe real love and romance sets us upright.. I think we are so used to flying upside down that when we are set straight by love.. we are all shook up and we don't know what's happening to us.  Our endorphins are soaring like a natural drug high and we feel like we are somehow out of control.. it's a very scarry place to be.. we feel volunerable and yes, even insecure.  

I personally believe that most people live in a love rut.  They settle into such a deep ditch that when faced with romance, sensuality, honest sexuality, and true love making, they run from it.. its just too scarry a place to be for them.. I've been there too.  I know that feeling.  I once had a man come to me after we broke up, I truely loved him, I think.. and I told him straight out.. "I don't know what to do with you"..  And, I didn't.  

To me, being in love is the perfect solution for us.. in every situation.  However, love itself is perfect.. we are not and being in the presence of genuine love makes us feel our humanity more than usual.. that's the scary part.  Then, when in the arms of our lover, and that fear subsides into the little things that lovers do, all fear escapes us.. and we are finally free to be in love without all of that initial fear and insecurity.. This is my thought.  

Truth, in this life- young man; older woman.. yes, I've found this to be exactly the truth in my own experience! 

When this truth became overwhelmingly evident to me; when I first knew that the younger men who were asking for dates really meant they wanted to date, I was dumb struck.  I, too, had no earthly idea why a young man, in his prime, would want to date a woman my age.. (I'm 61).  No idea.. I was clueless. 

Finally, I started asking them.. and to be honest, the answer in this vide is the same answer I got from them every single time..